Some batteries at ENORMOUS RESOLUTION
There was a story attached to these. It went something like “Hello, it’s GigerPunk AGAIN. I got my friend, who’s a professional photographer, to take some ridiculously high-res photos of some batteries with his fancy camera”.
The end result is ten 4.3MB photos of a varied selection of batteries (CAUTION: Contains rechargeables), weighing in at 3888 x 2592 and taken by a Canon EOS 40D. Some of the focus work is superb.
They took quite a long time to upload. While this one was uploading we made a cup of tea.
While this one was uploading we went outside and fed the chickens, not that it’s worth feeding the chickens given the number of eggs they lay – ZERO.
While this one was uploading we paced anxiously around the kitchen, worrying about what’s for dinner tonight. We had the sausages yesterday so… god knows. Will probably have to go to the shop and get more sausages later.
While this one was uploading we browsed the Sony Ericsson press extranet. Which, in hindsight, only served to make the upload even slower.
While this one was uploading we made a cup of coffee with two teaspoons of coffee, as doing nothing on the internet all day is more fun with lots of coffee inside you.
While this one was uploading we bought a bit more credit on Newzbin, to allow the prompt downloading of the new episodes of Lost in HD.
Not sure what we did while this one was uploading.
While this one was uploading we tutted and sighed at some of the rubbish things people email to us, expecting us to get excited about.
And while this one was uploading we compiled this list of what we did while the others uploaded.
It took about 20 minutes in total.
filed in BATTERIES! on Feb.04, 2010
February 4th, 2010 on 11:35 am
This work smacks of Colin Simper (1914 – Present)a Dutch photographer best known for his work with the Underground Camera group during World War II. After the war, he moved to Japan where he attended Musashino Art School training along side Taku Aramasa.
He graduated from Musashino Art School in 1960, and set up a design company in which he was an art director, but has worked freelance as an advertising photographer since 1978, specialising in batteries, his photographs appear in magazines around the world.
Could be wrong though.
February 4th, 2010 on 11:36 am
Tch. 20 minutes? Took me an hour to upload to you to begin with…or at least I set it going and went to lunch and it was done when I got back an hour later. I forget what I had now (it being back in early November), don’t think it was sausages though.
I liked the way he’d unwittingly arranged the sony batteries into the start of a swastika.
February 4th, 2010 on 12:07 pm
I can indeed confirm it’s Colin’s work.
Can neither confirm nor deny the rest, but graduating aged 44 sounds about right for Colin.
February 4th, 2010 on 12:15 pm
Not wishing to be too much of a pedant, but I think he graduated aged 46. Nice pics though.
February 4th, 2010 on 12:40 pm
Blimey there’s someone more pedantic than you Mr Gigerpunk…
As for Colin – His first photographs were published in 1927. These early photos already showed careful composition and sensitivity to tonal balance.
In letters and cards to family, he also expresses his daring to climb to the best view points and brave the worst elements.
At this point, however, Colin was still planning a career in music, even though his small hands, easily bruised by bravura playing, limited his ability.
It took several more years, though, for Colin to finally concede that at best he might become a concert pianist of limited range, an accompanist, or a piano teacher.
With this realisation he moved to Japan to study photography.
So it was Colin’s continued delusional belief that he could be the next Andrews Sisters that led to his late graduation at Musashino Art School in 1960.
February 4th, 2010 on 12:47 pm
“While this one was uploading we tutted and sighed at some of the rubbish things people email to us, expecting us to get excited about.”
I only ever e-mailed one thing in, it wasn’t related to anything that Idiot likes or is interested in. It was about a bad cushion, but not bad in an EXTRALAST or UK:R kind of way. I like to imagine that this, specifically, is what idiot spent 2 minutes tutting about.
I’ll make sure the quality is higher if I ever attempt a contribution again. Something more like these very fine pictures. My excuse is that I was drunk.
February 4th, 2010 on 1:01 pm
The #1 tut-causer is when people send me photos of the well-known coffee/cafe franchise “Segafredo”.
I get about one of those a week.
February 4th, 2010 on 1:30 pm
Sorry, I’ll stop that now then.
Btw, sent you some more teclast goodness
February 4th, 2010 on 1:37 pm
So I attempted to compile a “what’s going on” for this sequence of images and I can’t get past how the Canon pack comes into play. A rival gang?
Plus I keep swooping back into obvious sex themes.
February 4th, 2010 on 1:56 pm
Men no me – I’m sure the knowledge that the blurry whiteness in the background of the last 2 pics (top right) is actually Colin’s toilet pedestal will blow your mind then – work that into your story…
(I just like the mental image of Colin trying to explain what he’s doing in the toilet with a camera and a load of batteries – “It’s for some people on the internet, honest” isn’t really going to help clear things up, is it?)
February 4th, 2010 on 2:21 pm
Bring on the teclast!
February 4th, 2010 on 4:27 pm
The image of Colin on the loo’s floor is far better than anything I could whip up.
It looks spacious in there, unless he’s leaning his body out in the hallway. Can we get confirmation on his position when taking these shots?
February 4th, 2010 on 4:55 pm
“Reverse Cowboy”, I believe.
February 4th, 2010 on 5:25 pm
I’m frightened by larger than life photos. I mean, how’s it possible to make a picture of something larger than it is in real life?
February 4th, 2010 on 5:37 pm
I don’t want to click on them in case my budget PC’s 512 meg of RAM isn’t up to the task. As the Vietnamese lady in Full Metal Jacket says, “too beau coup”.
February 5th, 2010 on 11:13 am
Lovely flooring. B&Q I believe? I have the same in my bathroom.
February 5th, 2010 on 11:40 am
You keep chickens? Are you a hippy? Don’t you know what supermarkets are for?!?!?!
February 5th, 2010 on 7:18 pm
all right here we go:
Pic #1: It is a quiet, cold night as Franky and 2 friends slowly smoke stale cigarettes.
Pic #2: Franky’s brother, Clive, shows up and the gang gang falls in line, ready for action.
Pic#3: They attempt a basic formation but Franky and Jimmy are screwing it up, royally.
Pic #4: The cops roll by in there black cruiser. Clive gets antsy and accidentally shoots Franky and Jimmy.
Pic #5: The ambulance arrives, but it is too late for Jimmy, Franky looked OK but dies on the way to the hospital.
Pic#6: Franky and Jimmy’s coffin
Pic#7: Local gang union boys perform the missing men formation.
Pic #8:the last scene in the movie, the camera focuses on Franky and Jimmy eulogized on the coffin
Pic#9: we pan out and see the tears of regret and shame on Clive and Friend #3 knowing they should have just skipped the break dance competition this year.
Fin.
February 6th, 2010 on 4:36 am
Of course you realize what you’ve just done here is write John Travolta’s next movie.
Do you need an agent?
February 8th, 2010 on 9:15 am
WDF ?? Thats my bathroom floor. Surely B&Q didnt manage to offload 2 lots of the dark grey click-n-lock ??
February 9th, 2010 on 4:10 am
It’s interesting that battery updates generate more comments than other posts (even those with Asian birds).
February 10th, 2010 on 11:19 am
GigerPunk is my hero. Sometimes I think that batteries are dead for me. And then something like this comes along and re-energises my interest. Slightly concerned by the re-chargeables but I might get to like them in that slightly guilty way.