DOG WHEELCHAIR! Dog Wheelchair has a web site, a web site which is for people who “Care for an Elderly, Injured, or Special Needs Dog, Cat, or Pet”. That is their odd capitalisation, not ours.

Lucky handicapped dog. The handicapped dogs get all the nice chicks.

OFFICIAL CAPTION:
“Walkin’ Wheels dog wheelchair debuts in new movie featuring the story of Courtney Dunning and her handicapped dog Lucy.”

It’s the TAG Heuer Meridiist Automobili Lamborghini. It’s smaller than a Lamborghini, but every bit as ugly. It will also be owned by the lucky few for whom council tax bills are something to be laughed off and paid with loose change, rather than a crippling monthly burden.

Suppose it’s also for people who have better things to do with their lives than spend hours and hours slowly scrolling through lists of “apps” they have no intention of buying or using.

We were hoping the recession might have killed off rubbish ideas like this, but no. A Swarovski crystal version in gold trim with a better camera will be along soon.

She’ll be marked down very harshly for this. The new rules regarding difficulty introduced this season will force the judges to deduct as as many as 3.0 points from her overall score.

On the positive side, it looks like she’s attempting to win it by performing an ‘Accidental Tits Pop-Out’. A great move, always popular with the judges, but very tough to make it appear to be a genuine accident.

She’s also got it the wrong way round. It looks so easy to us at home, but under the pressure of that studio it’s all too easy to make mistakes.

Here’s an update that takes care of all three niches.

It – and by “it” we mean the robot vacuum cleaner – is Samsung’s “Tango” robot vacuum cleaner that now has a better camera in it. Or something like that. Didn’t really bother reading what Engadget said as we were suddenly in a bit of a rush to dig the high-res original photograph out of some god forsaken Korean tech blog.

Have given up trying to work out how the music industry works these days, as it doesn’t make much sense for a Big Pop Star to stick his new album up on a free streaming service. Shouldn’t they all be against this sort of thing?

But there it is. Have taken the liberty of Photoshopping out the “Recent Search” list as it was pretty bad. And looking at that image, it appears we have five “invites” to send out if anyone wants one.

ROBBIE WILLIAMS ALBUM REVIEW
A cursory skip through reveals what appears to be too many ballads and some “ironic” rock moments.

Those scissors could work! That blade looks like it’s proper metal and could even featured machine-sharpened edges. Alan Reid did not suffer in vain.

Would everyone be OK with it if next year we knock this on the head and start doing a blog about people cutting ribbons with HUGE scissors? We may also branch out into “Huge Cheques”.

Too complicated. Breaking out in a bit of a sweat just looking at that button array. Even the viewfinder has a little dial on it. Its strap probably comes with an installation CD full of PDFs of possible adjustment settings.

Still, were one to appear on eBay in the year 2014 with a cracked LCD screen and broken zoom for under £50 including recorded delivery, it might be worth a go out of curiosity. It’s going to be great fun playing with all of today’s amazing new technology in five years time.

Not sure there’s much of a demographic crossover between people that buy external hard drives and people who like shiny pink things, but presumably someone at Buffalo did a survey and is confident enough to put his or her job on the line over this.

It’s the MiniStation Lite, in “Sakura Pink” and “Lapis Blue”. £70 for the 320GB one and £90 for the 500GB one. Sorry this isn’t very interesting but we’re bored and the email just arrived, and it was either do this or continue staring at the desktop icons until they start forming shapes.

This one is called…

“His All Holiness Bartholomew The Archbishop of Constantinople, New Rome and The Ecumenical Patriarch; The Coca-Cola Polar Bear and His Eminence Archbishop Demetrios, Primate of the Greek Orthodox Church in America at The World of Coca-Cola, Atlanta, Georgia, USA”.

See?

Got one of these. It comes with a free minute, plus two subsidised half price text messages per calendar fortnight.

It also comes with 100 free “Look at the Times” so you can use it to look at the time. Extra Look at the Times cost 25p, or 50p during peak hours.